Beholding the God of hesed

2020 started like every other year.
           Dreams were held.
                  Vacation plans were made.
                         And new adventures awaited!
                            Church. Work. School. Birthdays. Weddings.
                                   Hospital visits. Nursing home & care home visits.
                                          Funerals.

Life was being lived, as usual … until it came to a screeching halt.
    Dreams were crushed.
       Vacation plans cancelled.
         New adventures weren't to be had … at least, not the kind of adventures people wanted!
             No church. No work, unless you were deemed “essential.”
                 School went to an online platform.
                    No birthday parties.
                         Wedding plans were drastically changed.
                          Visiting the sick or elderly were no more.
                    Even funerals were no longer happening, “as normal.”
              Then the riots started.
           Protests … a few were peaceful; however, the vast majority were not peaceful.
     Crime & murder rates skyrocketing.

New terminology began to dominate life …
Social distancing.
          Masks.
                COVID19.
                    Flatten the curve.
                        Stay-at-home orders.
                              Quarantine.

While all the negatives have been going on … and are still going on, in many respects … I began to experience a paradigm shift within myself in April. I was invited to an online retreat with women from Sioux Lookout, Ontario, (& my cousin in Edmonton, Alberta) … It was their first online retreat; however, with me present, it became their first international online retreat. My world expanded beyond what I've known the day I met these beautiful women! My heart was, instantly, knit to theirs in a way that I cannot describe.

During this online retreat, I was introduced to a new word … a beautiful Hebrew word … hesed. I was captivated by what I heard and learned about the GOD of hesed. And I desperately needed to know more! 

I read a book about hesed entitled Inexpressible Hesed by Michael Card.

I never would have dreamed that I'd encounter God the way I have encountered Him … an encounter that was made possible only by God's gracious providence and this particular path of life ... a path, that I'd soon learn, that He was walking with me.

The word hesed is used over 200 times within the pages of Scripture, and the weight of its meaning is massive! In English, hesed has been translated into words such as: love, lovingkindness, merciful love, loyal love, sure love, affectionate satisfaction, loving instruction, steadfast love, covenant friendship, persistent faithfulness, clemency, piety, devotion, generous yes … (taken from Inexpressible Hesed) … the list goes on and on. Not long after my introduction to this rich word, I began reading through the book of Psalms. I circled everywhere I saw 'steadfast love' … the most common ESV rendering of hesed. I found, at least, 123 references to the 'steadfast love' of God within the book of Psalms. 26 of those references were found in one Psalm … Psalm 136.

Today, hesed is never too far from the forefront of my mind … even after the retreat and reading the book Inexpressible Hesed. I've come to see that God's hesed flows from WHO He is … it's behind everything He does and allows to come into the lives of His children.

As I thought about these last several months, I began to realize that my journey with the God of hesed, actually, began five years ago when I was forced into the role of caregiving and parental advocacy. As I stepped into the ICU room to see my father on life support following a hemorrhagic stroke and emergency brain surgery, I was put on a path headed to the God of hesed ... I just didn't know it. Since our journey began, there have been many ups and downs. Multiple surgeries ... some deemed minor. Others deemed life-threatening. Seven bouts with sepsis. Many sleepless, tear filled nights ... with no hope of a full recovery, even as we continue on this journey. 

HOWEVER ... In the most unlikely year that's been filled with COVID19 chaos and more traumatic events, the darkness has lifted. Hope has returned. Purpose prevails. The grace of Heaven has infiltrated life. As I've thought about the journey with my father (which started five years ago today on 9/29/2015), I can say that the change has been because the LORD has met me here ... in my part of His meta-narrative ... This God of hesed has graciously allowed me to behold His face ... little by little this year. I've been blessed to see His nail-scarred hands holding mine as I've walked through the uncharted waters of caregiving and through the uncharted waters in which I find myself today. The God who is rich in steadfast love has placed His love within me so that I may love my father and those around me. This God who is persistently faithful has paved the way for me to walk in His steps ... no matter the journey of life ... I've caught a glimpse of this God of hesed. I've caught a glimpse of my Heavenly Father's face. I've felt His approval and His comfort. 

As I've begun to behold the God of hesed, my question for you, Beloved Friend, is do YOU know this God?